“What you decide to do with your disappointment will determine whether you are good or evil”. I do not know the author. But it makes lot of sense. Word disappointment literally means to be “removed from the office”. It brings with it a feeling of an outcome that we did not expect and more important, of something being definitive. Disappointment is one of the most important feeling in decision making and people try to avoid it more than almost any other emotion.
My disappointment with my job led me to find the better one. Disappointment of not getting scholarship led me to prepare better and get it the next time. Disappointment of lost love led me to grow up in the process and meet someone that fitted me more (at that time). Disappointment was my most powerful fuel in conquering my biggest fears and I hate to say it but – it was one of my biggest motivators. But don’t get me wrong thinking that I am here promoting a shitty feeling. I say loud and clear: disappointment sucks. On every level.
However I did write once: we live from of our good days, we learn from our bad ones. You cannot avoid feeling disappointed. So it is given to you anyways. Make it your fuel to rethink your wishes and strengthen them, or make it turn you to something else completely. Recognise it as a valuable emotion. Decide you are going to use it to make something out of it. New beginning or new direction for the same goal.
In an interview this is what Earl Nightingale said on the topic: “I have had a lot of disappointments, but you know they have usually led on to other successes, to additional successes. I know that there have been times when I thought: “I’m terribly sorry that this is happening but I realize that maybe I’m being led to another slightly different direction in order to achieve these things that I want to achieve.”
In the end, I might redo a bit a sentence from beginning: What we do with our disappointment determine whether we resurface as bitter or stronger. The choice is (as always) ours.